2008/09/09

¡Esto se acaba!



Pues parece que sí, unos científicos cachondos de Suiza van a hacer mañana un experimento en un acelerador de partículas para intentar recrear el big bang, momento de la creación de todo este tinglado que llamamos universo infinito... Con dos cojones los tíos... La cosa es que hay una posibilidad de 1 por 10 elevado a la menos cuarenta (cero coma, cuarenta ceros y un uno al final) de que se cree un agujero negro que acabe con el planeta en 2,28 segundos, y con el resto del sistema solar en un tiempo cortito, que una vez reducido a mi mínima expresión de volumen/máxima expresión de masa (lo que se llama un caldo concentrado de ameba), lo mismo me va a dar el universo; o quién sabe cómo se vive en un agujero negro... apretado, pasando estrecheces... Y muchos otros chistes fáciles.

Pues mira, que el futuro ya está aquí, creíamos que lo del año dos mil nos había salido rana, pues no, ya generamos big bangs y nos quedamos tan anchos (o estrechos, ya se verá). Sí, el otro día vi al bueno del Punset, gran guía espiritual/científico de este blog, hablando en Redes con un señor de estos tan listos que le gustan. Resulta que este señor comentaba los avances tecnológicos que nos acompañarán en los próximos años, de flipar, vamos. En cuarenta años tendremos nanomáquinas, cerebros artificiales y las mil puñetas, garantizándonos casi la inmortalidad.

La cosa me dejó un poco contrariado, que yo me quiero morir; igual no hoy, pero sí algún día, vamos, si he nacido también tendré que morir, digo yo... me parece lo justo, o por lo menos, lo más educado.

Me gustó una opción que daba, así de futuro, lo de hacerse un Backup de tu cerebro, lo que viene a ser tu persona, vamos, y de ahí me salió la solución. Siendo sincero, la inmortalidad también me gusta, así como idea, me quitaría mucho estrés el saber que tengo tiempo para todo y que veré el futuro, así que ya he pensado qué haré. Yo viviré en mi cuerpo biológico todo lo que me parezca decente vivir; cien años me parece una cifra redonda, aunque con ciento veinticinco ya llego al año dos mil cien, pero puesto, con ciento treinta y siete llego al dos mil ciento doce, que es capicúa, mira es una buena edad para morirme, entonces activo el backup de mi cerebro, me despido de todos, me tomo un chisme conmigo mismo, y me piro a lo que haya más allá de la vida.

¿Mola o no mola?

En cualquier caso, ha sido un placer conoceros, aunque yo ya he quedado para el miércoles y me jodería perderme esa cita.

Nos vemos el jueves.



Para bajaros la cancioncita de los científicos chotas, aquí un link.

The Large Hadron Rap

Twenty-seven kilometers of tunnel under ground
Designed with mind to send protons around
A circle that crosses through Switzerland and France
Sixty nations contribute to scientific advance
Two beams of protons swing round, through the ring they ride
‘Til in the hearts of the detectors, they’re made to collide
And all that energy packed in such a tiny bit of room
Becomes mass, particles created from the vacuum
And then…

LHCb sees where the antimatter’s gone
ALICE looks at collisions of lead ions
CMS and ATLAS are two of a kind
They’re looking for whatever new particles they can find.
The LHC accelerates the protons and the lead
And the things that it discovers will rock you in the head.

We see asteroids and planets, stars galore
We know a black hole resides at each galaxy’s core
But even all that matter cannot explain
What holds all these stars together – something else remains
This dark matter interacts only through gravity
And how do you catch a particle there’s no way to see
Take it back to the conservation of energy
And the particles appear, clear as can be

You see particles flying, in jets they spray
But you notice there ain’t nothin’, goin’ the other way
You say, “My law has just been violated – it don’t make sense!
There’s gotta be another particle to make this balance.”
And it might be dark matter, and for first
Time we catch a glimpse of what must fill most of the known ‘Verse.
Because…

LHCb sees where the antimatter’s gone
ALICE looks at collisions of lead ions
CMS and ATLAS are two of a kind
They’re looking for whatever new particles they can find.

Antimatter is sort of like matter’s evil twin
Because except for charge and handedness of spin
They’re the same for a particle and its anti-self
But you can’t store an antiparticle on any shelf
Cuz when it meets its normal twin, they both annihilate
Matter turns to energy and then it dissipates

When matter is created from energy
Which is exactly what they’ll do in the LHC
You get matter and antimatter in equal parts
And they try to take that back to when the universe starts
The Big Bang – back when the matter all exploded
But the amount of antimatter was somehow eroded
Because when we look around we see that matter abounds
But antimatter’s nowhere to be found.
That’s why…

LHCb sees where the antimatter’s gone
ALICE looks at collisions of lead ions
CMS and ATLAS are two of a kind
They’re looking for whatever new particles they can find.
The LHC accelerates the protons and the lead
And the things that it discovers will rock you in the head.

The Higgs Boson – that’s the one that everybody talks about.
And it’s the one sure thing that this machine will sort out
If the Higgs exists, they ought to see it right away
And if it doesn’t, then the scientists will finally say
“There is no Higgs! We need new physics to account for why
Things have mass. Something in our Standard Model went awry.”

But the Higgs – I still haven’t said just what it does
They suppose that particles have mass because
There is this Higgs field that extends through all space
And some particles slow down while other particles race
Straight through like the photon – it has no mass
But something heavy like the top quark, it’s draggin’ its ***
And the Higgs is a boson that carries a force
And makes particles take orders from the field that is its source.
They’ll detect it….

LHCb sees where the antimatter’s gone
ALICE looks at collisions of lead ions
CMS and ATLAS are two of a kind
They’re looking for whatever new particles they can find.

Now some of you may think that gravity is strong
Cuz when you fall off your bicycle it don’t take long
Until you hit the earth, and you say, “Dang, that hurt!”
But if you think that force is powerful, you’re wrong.
You see, gravity – it’s weaker than Weak
And the reason why is something many scientists seek
They think about dimensions – we just live in three
But maybe there are some others that are too small to see
It’s into these dimensions that gravity extends
Which makes it seem weaker, here on our end.
And these dimensions are “rolled up” – curled so tight
That they don’t affect you in your day to day life
But if you were as tiny as a graviton
You could enter these dimensions and go wandering on
And they'd find you...

When LHCb sees where the antimatter’s gone
ALICE looks at collisions of lead ions
CMS and ATLAS are two of a kind
They’re looking for whatever new particles they can find.
The LHC accelerates the protons and the lead
And the things that it discovers will rock you in the head.

1 comentarios:

Anónimo dijo...

¡Hurra, estamos vivos!
(Johannes M. Simmel)